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This period signifies a ten-year milestone since the word “ghosting” entered the mainstream. At the time, the notion that someone could abruptly cease all contact with a romantic interest without a word seemed like the height of rudeness. We were so innocent. In the 10 years since, seeking a partner has only become more bewildering – an oftentimes pointless endeavor in embarrassment that is increasingly pigeonholed by social media lingo.

Zoomers, a cohort who came of age during a loneliness epidemic, a masculinity reckoning, and a widespread challenge on the freedoms of females and the LGBTQ+ community, faces a significantly more chaotic environment than their Gen Y forerunners could ever envision. And so their romantic glossary has grown more elaborate and more unhinged, with phrases like “Shrekking” and “vine swinging” testing the limits of your mental fortitude.

What follows is a extensive breakdown to the phrases this generation is using to discuss love, sex and the pursuit of both. To channel one of the recent most enduring memes, by the conclusion of this list you’ll yearn to get back to a bygone era – because wherever that is, it is free from “ideological catfishing”.

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The Letter A

Genuineness – For gen Z, romance's ultimate goal is showing up as your real, unvarnished self. Best wishes with that!

The Letter B

Avian theory – A social media test inspired by a methodology developed by relationship scientists, in which you mention something minor – for example, “I saw a bird today” – and note whether your date's reaction is inquisitive or brushed off. If they do not want to hear more about the bird, you two are not compatible.

Black cat girlfriend – Zoomers' rebuttal to the “manic pixie dream girl” trope of the early 2000s – but instead of having short fringe, liking indie music and eschewing commitment, the mysterious partner puts herself first while oozing enigma and self-sufficiency. (She may yet have baby bangs.)

The Letter C

Seat theory – This means choosing someone who aids you proactively. If you entered a room, they would get a seat for you to take a load off.

Choremance – A meet-up where two people connect while handling tasks, such as pet care or grocery shopping. In other words, how cash-strapped twentysomethings do affordable romance in a post-“$5 beer and shot combo” world.

Emotional spiral – Melting down when you feel swamped by life. You can crash out over a infatuation or breakup, dumping all of your (unrequited) emotions.

The Letter D

Dink – Dual income no kids. Once a signifier of 1980s young urban professional excess, it describes couples who forgo parenthood to focus on their own well-being. Or because they cannot afford to become parents.

E

Open communication – The opposite of acting aloof: embracing dialogue, transparency and vulnerability.

F

Flags

• Danger signals – Behavioral habits suggesting a potential partner is trouble. Such as calling their exes unstable, poor gratuity habits, a love of Woody Allen films, a new DJ career …
• Green flags – These quirks validate your choice to pursue a mate. Such as checking in to make sure you got home safe after a date, minimal screen time, having a proper bed …
• Odd but harmless traits – These typically describe specific, largely benign quirks. For instance being an keen ornithologist, still carrying around a pen in their purse, paying rent in physical money …

Shared obsession pairing – When you find someone who’s just as obsessive about films about the second world war or DVD collecting or art or anything it may be, as you. Or, conversely, finding someone who hates the same things or people that you do (nothing creates intimacy faster than having a common enemy).

G

The band Geese – A band your gen Z boyfriend listens to.

Zombie-ing – Someone who pops back into your life after a period of disappearing.

Eager-to-please partner – Someone who is friendly, eager to please and devoted. The uncommon partner who is beloved by all of his significant other's friends, and a mysterious partner's opposite.

Gooners – A primarily online subculture of men so preoccupied with self-pleasure that they attempt marathon sessions, deliberately postponing climax so they can persist as long as possible.

H

Pessimistic straight dating – A phenomenon describing many women's increasing cynicism toward straight relationships. It will come as little surprise to anyone who read the above entry.

High-value woman – An stereotype championed by manosphere figures: a woman who is attractive, nurturing and contentedly domestic, who apparently has no aspirations of her own aside from satisfying her man partner. Maybe now you’re beginning to see the whole “pessimism” thing better?

The Letter I

Ick factors – Random and often mundane turnoffs that instantly kill any feelings of attraction.

“Actions speak louder" – Something to tell yourself after you watch someone else receive an incredibly romantic act.

The Letter J

Professions – These have not been this significant in the romance landscape since the Wall Street era. For some women, a “finance bro” is the ultimate partner: a preppy, conservative-leaning guy who will be a provider (there’s a popular TikTok audio on the topic). Meanwhile the left-leaning crowd seek out partners in professions they see as being staffed by the more nurturing among us: healthcare workers, educators or counselors.

K

Kissing – This year, scientists learned that the kiss has existed for 16 million years. But the days of kissing may be waning since some Zoomers prefer fewer sex scenes in movies, as they are having less sex themselves and do not find onscreen romance believable.

Light catfishing – Catfishing-lite. Or, not exactly being dishonest about who you are, but maybe using older (better) pictures of yourself on a dating app profile, or making your job sound more prestigious than it is. Also known as {